Spiritual Pressure

If you have ever watched or seen an anime or manga they talk about this thing called Spiritual Pressure. Its where you can feel the persons true nature or intent. Even how powerful they truly are. Not like strength but that can be part of it, but mentally and emotionally.

This pressure has lots of feelings. People can be black, red, green, dozens. It can be cold, warm, oily and slick. Even rough. Or scary and frightening. Sometimes nice and welcoming.

Now you guys are like???????? That I am crazy.

I have a reason.

So I am taking the bus now. And today I had another person...in like ten seconds start telling me his life story. How he was in drug court and all these other things. He was talking to me like an old friend. And we talked for twenty minutes. At one of the stops a man just started talking to me.

Now I say that as I tend to attract people with.....well I believe I can feel these powers. These pressures off of people. Now the first guy had a small presence. He did not want to be noticed. The second guy..it was bright and happy. He wanted to make people happy.

Now I say this cause I tend to attract people. Or so I am told. One of my art teachers told me that when I enter a room, even if I am acting small, I become the center of attention and people want me to notice them. So I can't stand in class and paint anymore.

But the people I attract tend to have the rougher feelings, like unsure or anger or hurt. Allot of Hurt and Anger really. I can see the red of theirs, how it's so rough and will grow and shrink. They can't control theirs. How it grows hot when they are agitated and cold when scared.

I often wonder what mine must be...I guess it has to be warm to attract total strangers. And big...I say big because I somehow end up the center of things without trying to. It has to be slightly rougher but mostly clean because of how much self training I have done. And the color...lol you choose.

A still moment

Ahhh the cool refreshing taste of lemonade sliding down my throat. The sun just hitting my face and chest in the right spots. Warming me to the right temperature  warm enough in the sun but not to warm to hate the breeze that kisses my skin every so often. I loving sitting in the sun and listen to the world pass me by in my moments of peacefulness. 

I enjoy these moment, when I am allowed to hit the pause button and let my mind ease for a moment. To not have to think or have to be on guard of the world. I am world weary at 18, but I am also world ready as-well. Because of this I ma high strung and ready for action but I plead that each day not require me to go 110% but maybe an easy 90% or 50%? Lol I know I normally don't get it but I do get lucky. Such as today. 

No drama at school. Prepared to move out. Grades are a meh feeling. I love my God and He Loves me. I love my job and I have an amazing girlfriend who always puts a smile on my face. Today life is good. So go out and laugh and live with your friends and loved ones. We earned it. 

Heros

You know there is one simple problem with being the Hero. And I am willing to bet you younglings don't know what it is. I will give you a minute..........can't figure it out?

It's really simple, I promise. I know the answer...do you want it? Yes? Okay..be warned this might ruin the image of them for you. Okay still reading? Good.

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They die young. But the few that live through that ordeal, they are expected to be a Hero again and again. Time after time they expect you to save the world...or even your town. I don't judge. Well just think about it, they tell you in movies the Hero lives and the Villain dies...sorry kiddo life doesn't work that way. Movies exists to make you feel better about your pathetic excuse for a life. Sorry you said you wanted the truth, but any way they want you to feel gooooood about yourself. The good guy wins and the bad guy loses.

Well life is sometimes sick and twisted. The naivete of kids your age makes me sick some times. You really think the good guy is always going to win? Hell he's lucky if he wins half the time, hell even a third...or a tenth. Bad guys have an advantage in war, fights. They have no rules they have no laws or moral obligations. You think all men who are "evil" have a reason? Like daddy leaving when they were ten? HA! Some do it cause one simple reason...they can. Nothing stops them. Nothing will.

Why? The good guy, the Hero has to live by certain moral and ethic codes. He has things to live for. The bad guy the villain, some times just the guy on the other side of the road doesn't. Well the Hero can't kill a guy who is near death the "villian" can and most likely will.


I know this cause I have seen it. Good lord I have seen so many Hero's burn in their own self-rightoues quests, and I have caused many to fall.


A wicked smile crosses his face. Perfectly straight white teeth glimmer in the bar. The music dies and a sudden realization dawns on the young man. The guy who has been helping him was...no.

The police found a body hanging from a tree, a gun in his hand blood seeping down his limp form. His skin had been peeled back and what looked like salt poured on his wounds. To this day no one can find who killed the kid.

A=/=C

There comes a moment, one in life where everything sits on a precept. Waiting on the edge with something as weak as a breeze to knock it off and rolling. And in those moments your life is clear, clearer then the bluest lake you have ever seen. Every little mistake every little idiotic stupid pathetic moment hangs there above your head. That moment shakes and tumbles with ideals and new revelation's. It begins to break lose.

You see yourself as a little kid, that one time you said that really mean nasty awful hurtful thing to your best friend. The time that person you liked said no and you felt sick to your stomach and most likely almost hurled chunks all over them. That big test. For me I see a lonely kid in fifth grade with no real friends taking a math class to far above his head. A boy of eighth grade trying to ask girls out and failing. A freshman who does not who or what or why anymore.

The revelations falls. SOOOOOO slow. Your world is about to change, everything. Not just a tiny bit, like "I can change that." But no more like "I will change that." You see how your future can play out. How with one step you can go from a little pea-body in high-school to leading the largest church in the world. (Far Fetched I know.) For me I see it falling, splitting as if by lightening and a powerful force enough to rend the heavens open like they are paper. I see my self from being the ASB president, which I always hope wont be the high point of my life, to being a foreign diplomat and one day standing before a crowd of thousands and thousands, rallying them behind my banner to vote for me. To give me the honor and duty to become their leader, for them to give me the chance to lead the greatest nation in the world. The Revelation?

Ohh ha I forgot. That was God coming to Jesus stomp me, AKA going from an Atheist to a Christian.